Time for yourself is not “Self-ish”!

Many people struggle with making time for themselves. We’re busy. And have commitments. And families. And jobs outside the home. Our priorities tend to focus on others, and not ourselves. Because in our ancient DNA, we’re tribal – so focus on others is a survival strategy.

Please consider this: Self-care IS about WELLNESS, ENERGY and an INTEGRATED life. Self-care is not “self-ish,” though it is appropriately, temporarily, self-focused in a healthy way.

Mindfulness practices have a helpful effect on:

  • Anxiety / depression
  • Sleep
  • Your brain – these are related to actual changes that may reflect an increased sense of relaxation, self- and other-awareness, compassion and stress reduction

Mindfulness is:

  • IS awareness and focus
  • IS NOT “new age-y” – it’s been around for a very long time!
  • Can be practiced alone or with others
  • Has many forms of practice: guided imagery, meditation, yoga

Meditation – 3 components we attend to:

  • Posture – a comfortable, supported spine, to encourage awareness and focused energy
  • Breath – it is the simplest focus when you begin, and is the harbor to which you return – you may already do this! When we need to pause, we often tell ourselves: “just breathe…”
  • Thoughts – that is, a vacation from thoughts – letting them go, not engaging in a relationship with your thoughts. The Latin root for vacation is “vacare” – which means “empty” or “leisure” (American Heritage Dictionary). Think of meditation as a relieving break from thoughts, especially the ones that aren’t helpful!

Have that vacation from your thoughts!

In mindfulness meditation, you learn that you do not have to react to every thought. It is a practice of noticing thoughts and letting them go.

For those of you who feel you can “never sit still long enough!” to achieve a meditative state:

  • It is ironic – new meditators discover something DOES feel different – even after just a few minutes
  • Many report to me that they feel: calmer, sleepy, relaxed, or able to take a deep breath

Mindfulness practices to try – notice how you feel!

  • SQUARE BREATHING:
    • breathe in for 4 counts, pause for 4 counts, exhale for 4, then pause again; repeat
    • many clients have told me they notice an effect after three “squares” – this takes just a couple of minutes
  • FOCUS ON THE PRESENT MOMENT: while walking or doing a routine chore
    • let your mind be IN your walk or chore
    • notice engagement through your senses
    • take full breaths in and out as you walk/work

I use mindfulness with clients in session and for their time between sessions. There are practices couples can use together, as well as individually.

Please feel free to contact me with any questions or to discuss the use of mindfulness practices and how they might help you.

Telephone: 843-271-4771

Email: [email protected]